Our hearts go out to Mick Conley, the partner of the late Glen Elder, and we thank Seven Days for printing his letter below. This week's Seven Days ran the letters in response, including ours from RU12?:
Seven Days only runs “letters to the editor” that respond to content that has appeared in the paper or on our website. In this case, however, we made an exception, because there would be no other public forum for Michael Conley’s story. Fletcher Allen Health Care declined to respond to his version of events because of strict patient confidentiality laws.
POOR TREATMENT
My partner of 15 years, Dr. Glen Elder, died on May 21, 2009, at the Fletcher Allen emergency room. He had been jogging, and collapsed. The following week his death certificate listed long-term heart disease as his cause of death. I spoke to the doctor who had seen Glen on May 19 to see how this could have happened, and his answer was, “It happens.” Glen had been a patient of Dr. Mark Pasanen for 15 years, and Glen’s medical chart always indicated that he was at high risk for heart disease due to his family history. I do not understand how a supposedly perfectly healthy 42-year-old can just drop dead.
When I went to the emergency room to see Glen’s body, a social worker, Tim Stamatis, escorted me to the morgue. He motioned for me to go around a wall and see the body. When I did, I was euphoric. It was not Glen. I knew then that a horrible mistake had been made, and that somehow, Glen was still alive. However, then the social worker said he had the wrong body, and then brought out Glen’s body. It really made me wonder how Fletcher Allen cares for the dead. I really felt as if there were a stack of bodies in the back room, and he just brought out the one on top.
I went to Dr. Pasanen’s office to get Glen’s medical records in hopes of learning more about why Glen died at age 42. His receptionist told me that since Glen was dead, he could not give me permission to get his records. And as I was leaving his office, the lady even mocked me! Thirty minutes later, as I was driving back to Derby, I received a call telling me that if I provided a copy of our civil-union certificate, I would be given the records, but only on Tuesday, since that is the only day Fletcher Allen makes copies. How many times have the majority of readers been asked for a copy of their marriage license? I guess this is just a special rule for homosexual couples.
On the suggestion of one of the trustees, I wrote to Fletcher Allen CEO Dr. Melinda Estes. Her response was to have one of her employees call to tell me that Dr. Estes was preparing to leave on a business trip, but wanted the employee to express her condolences. Thank you, Dr. Estes, for your compassion!
Michael Conley
DERBY
THE CURE IS COMPASSION
I was deeply affected by Mr. Michael Conley’s letter regarding his poor treatment after the sudden death of his beloved partner, Dr. Glen Elder, in May [“Letters: Poor Treatment,” June 24] … I scoured the following issue for letters of follow-up, expressing condolences, empathy, outrage — anything — and was shocked to find nothing. Not one letter of acknowledgment of his gut-wrenching experience with Fletcher Allen and subsequent health care experiences related to his partner’s death.
And so, I am writing now, albeit a bit late. To you, Mr. Connelly: I am so sorry for your experience. As a registered nurse myself, and also a social-work student at UVM, let me be the first to say you deserved much more from the professional community. Their callousness and disconnected, disrespectful way of handling this traumatic and devastating situation was abhorrent. What you needed and deserved was consideration, compassion, patience, education … some acknowledgment of your grief and circumstance.
The physician should have explained heart disease more thoroughly and how this type of thing can, in fact, “just happen,” which is true, sadly. The social worker should have made certain the body he was presenting was that of your partner — there is no excuse whatsoever that warrants the wrong body being presented to you. The staff at the physician’s office did a great disservice to you as well: If your name was on anything as “significant other” in his chart, or “next of kin,” etc., releasing medical records to you should not have been an issue. See www.vtmed.org for more information on Vermont health care law.
Lastly, the seemingly third-party call from a “representative” of the CEO of Fletcher Allen is yet another jab of indecency. Her world is one of corporate engagement and tidy micro-level “quick fixes.” Sadly, there seems to be little room for real personal contact and sincerity to one individual. I am glad you wrote the letter to her and spoke out about your experience. Hopefully, her insensitivity to one does not accurately reflect her commitment to the greater whole of Fletcher Allen.
There should be a patient liaison in the hospital for complaints and concerns regarding care. Many places have a department specifically for that, where there is a filed complaint and then investigative research is done, acknowledgment of the error and some kind of preventative intervention are enacted. However, in this case, what you needed and deserved was plain and simple human kindness, consideration and compassion. I am so sorry for your loss, Mr. Conley. I hope you have found peace and comfort in loved ones around you. I only wish the medical community would have been a more effective part of that support system.
Sherry Williamson, RN
BURLINGTON
DISCRIMINATION IN DEATH?
We at the RU12? Community Center were disturbed to read about Michael Conley’s appalling experience at Fletcher Allen immediately after the sudden death of his 42-year-old partner of 15 years [“Letters: Poor Treatment,” June 24]. At RU12? we run an antiviolence/discrimination program for the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community, and we wish that Michael’s experience was unique. Unfortunately, we hear of entirely too many negative and often discriminatory experiences in many of our institutions and throughout the state, including Fletcher Allen. In spite of the recent advancement of equal rights for LGBT people in Vermont, health care is one of the areas where there is still work to be done so that every patient is treated with the respect and quality care they deserve. If you are a LGBT person who has experienced discrimination and want to report your experience or are in need of support or advocacy, please contact SafeSpace at 863-0003, or at safespace@ru12.org.
Kara DeLeonardis
BURLINGTON
DeLeonardis is executive director of RU12? Community Center.
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